State Fair!

September 2011

One dropped wirty dord.  But a fun video of breaking ties so to make room for a new beginnig starting this week.  :)  What a fantastic time to be alive!  Have to make your lemons into lemonade!  Theme of the month.

Beaumont: Grounding? Who wants to be grounded?

In sitting with a psychic, more for the fun than for any sort of guidance, she handed me a specimen of Chrysoprase and told me that it would aid me in grounding.  Grounding?!  I thought.  Who wants to be grounded?  What is the fun in that?  Haven't I been grounded all my life, isn't that why I have been crawling and clawing out of my skin in youth, in schooling, in marriage, in my career, is my need to escape going to be help through grounding?!  I've carried the rock despite, more for it's gorgeous blueish green smoky hues.  It's smooth to touch, and every time I look at it I'm inspired.

Today as I was driving counter clockwise circles amongst the meth labs of Beaumont, unable to find my way I began to think, 26....26....26....26....and I'm no where near ready to be settled.  Will I ever be? All my friends have kids, are married, have a stable happy life that in my heart of hearts I do crave. Then I grabbed the stone, and thought of grounding.  I haven't been fighting the constraints because I want to fight my grounding, I've been fighting because I have never been grounded in the first place.  If I ever want to be happy or content I do need to find a grounding.  That's what I'm dedicating this year to.

First off is stability.  While traveling the globe I will be taking in many new places, and I plan to take full advantage.  I remember one of my first trips with my DM, Auburn she turned to me and said she's never seen more than the mall in any town she's ever visited.  So I make a vow to do one thing outside the mall everywhere I go, thus the video camera, the blog, and the new promotion I fought so hard for.  Moreover, back to the point, despite my travels I hope to find some forms of stabilization.  Interesting how Joshua posted just the same earlier today as well.  Obviously we are mirrored in transitions, lucky for us we have each other.

We'll just see where to take it from there.

Pearland: A Blank White Page

It's been a crazy time of bouncing back and forth from ecstatic with anticipation to overcome with nostalgic longing to stay.  So much I wanted to do while living in Houston that I never got around to doing.  I drive through the museum district and think, I only made it to the Natural Science Museum three time and still have never seen the butterflies.  I pull into Galveston and think of how I spent entirely too little time at the beach!  I never even met up with my friends who were going to teach me to surf.  I never went to a musical, I never went to the Zoo, or floated in the paddle boats at Hermann Park.  I didn't spend nearly enough time with my cousins Keri or Liz.  I didn't make the drive to Matagorda to see Granny but three times in an entire year.   Bryan will try to knock out as much on this list as possible if I ever receive another day off in Houston, TX before the move!

On the same note I'm so ready to be out of this house, to be away from the chaos, and to be on my own.  I need away from the drama, and instead surrounded by uplifting and encouraging friends when I'm home.  I can't wait to hit the tarmac traveling to a new destination every week.  Grandmother and I went to one of our favorite tea shops and over egg salad and steaming Earl Grey english style she expressed to me her wishes.  In most cases I would reluctantly listen, and then seethe in silence as yet another person in my life has an opinion on how I should be living it, but I was different this time.  Perhaps it's my new longing for direction; I have never felt so alone and lost before.  Perhaps it's maturity has taken me to a level of patience to receive criticism.  Maybe I'm now humble enough to accept it, considering I finally have nothing left to prove to anyone.  Regardless of the reasoning I felt relief as she put into words exactly what I didn't know I felt.  "I want you to move to Dallas and be single for once.  I want you to discover yourself and discover love for yourself.  I want you to be away from any sort of family and be single and free.  Travel, take in every moment, live it up!  Give it two years before you settle down again, it will be good for you."  It was nice to not only hear that she was not upset for my move but in fact had dreams and hopes for me I had tucked away.  How does that woman know me so well?  Scary.

So the exciting perspective is that my world is now fresh and ready for me color and draw as abstractive, impressionistic, or precise as I choose.  I have never felt so free and open to opportunity.  Join the peace corps? Sure!  Fly the skies as a flight attendant.  Write a book.  Pull onto the freeway and just drive until I feel like stopping.  I'm so excited.  And to have friends, and know I want be as alone as I felt here is even more of a relief!  For the first time the fact that I love or hate my life is completely on me.  Let's make this a life worth remembering!

For now I am enjoying my two weeks of solitude.

Stephen's Final Day

This is only a director's cut of all the fun we had, of course based on our favorite series Sassy Stories. Enjoy!

Sedona: The Video

Sedona: The Sign

Tonight as I returned to my hotel room with a scratchy throat and no voice after a long day of training I collapsed onto my plush bed.  I felt restless still.  I felt as if I had to do something other than sit in here; a cave I've had to create considering the traffic walks directly by the windows and balcony. Heating up a TV Dinner and flipping on Law & Order SVU I fell back into my comatose state I enjoy of mindless games on Shockwave and reruns on the television to tune out.  I munched on dinner and chips and salsa, slowly making my way to the bottom of the bag where all the crunched up chips lie.  The kind that to dip into the halfway empty jar of salsa you must cover your knuckles in sticky tomato paste and onions.  I've never been good with messy hands, my mom and Grandmother both remind me that as a child I would instantly wash my hands if they became dirty with mud or paint.  I can't stand the feeling of even a large amount of dirt residue on them.

I gave it a moment and decided to drive to the grocery store to grab more chips, but then something happened.  I don't know if it was more the thought of 'I just went through entire bag of chips in as little as two days alone' which was adjoined with a flashback of my obesity, or if it was just that restless sense that has been following me since my plane landed on the runway of Phoenix.   Whatever it was, I Instead of turning into the grocery store, I turned into the residential area of Sedona.  I drove up and down the streets looking at all the architecture and extreme hippie/artist/new age culture that is the foundation of this town.  Somehow weaving down these roads named after different brands of coffee I found myself whizzing through a scenic wilderness in the sunset.  I blared my music and drove...and drove...and drove.  Destination anywhere.  The mountains' profile surround me and fill me further with that restless sense of adventure.  My mind started to race, what's next?  When will the previous chapter finally break me from its bonds?  I feel in my heart I'm supposed to return, only next time with someone, but who?  Did I make the correct decisions up to this point in life? All those wanna be esoteric questions that fill anyone in the transitional stage I have found myself in.

Suddenly, I was drawn to an off road which led to historic Cottonwood.  It was much like any other historic strip you would find like Fredricksburg or Brady, very 'cutesy'.  Crawling through at 25 mph the sun was nearly disappearing from the sky and I knew although I had not found what I was searching for it was time to turn back.  Just past the quaint block was a new residential development I used to flip through, and then made an immediate return to historic Cottonwood.  This time just as I pulled in front of the first shop, The Hippie Emporium, I found myself having to slam on my breaks for a peacock standing in the middle of the road staring up at me.  His feathers did not cast it's thousands of stares, but only the two eyes in his head.  I looked around, where did this come from?  It wasn't anywhere in sight when I just crawled through town not thirty seconds before?!  All I could see were two kids, no older than fourteen hiding in the alley of a vacant parking lot fumbling around to stuff their pipe they weren't thinking to conceal, and I highly doubt they were out walking their pet peacock.  So what is this trying to say to me?  The peacock is a creature who can not only endure snake venom, but turn it to solar iridescence.  They can find themselves in a jungle of only poisonous foliage and survive gobbling on that.  Possibly this is a reminder of my strength, or my ability to come across a drained spirit and revive it.  My ability to take on a surmountable amount turmoil and find the beauty in it, I feed off it.  Oh the possibilities of conclusions to draw are endless.

Sedona: day 1

I woke up incredibly early this morning, looked at the clock, reconsidered my decision to be up at six in the morning and agreed that an hour more of sleep would be good for me.  I was on the road to Sedona by 9am, but after having to pick up a brush and auxiliary cable at Target, then making one or two dyslexic turns, followed by absent mindedly missing my exit by 15 miles, I found myself standing in the hotel lobby by 12:30.  Now that I do the math of all the obstacles, I'm rather proud of my timing.

I walked into the tiny lobby and Kevin at the front greeted me with a huge familiar smile, "Ms. Eads, I was expecting you!" He nervously fumbled through the reservation cards while reassuring me that all my preferences have been covered when it comes to cost coverage of incidentals.  The clerk at the hotel last night in Phoenix did not seem to understand these terms, so I was overjoyed to know that I was finished with these petty battles for the remainder of this trip.

Everywhere I travel I seem to make an impression on the desk clerks, this is mostly due the fact that I cannot manage to remember to grab my room key on the way out of the room so they see me on nearly a daily basis.  In this case though, I couldn't seem to keep my key card activated on my last visit to Sedona.  The room is not the same as the one from last time.  I know my hotel in Beaumont and Port Arthur are very good about keeping me in the same room, I prefer the ones off to the side away from the commotion, and with the familiarity of 'my room'.  When you are away from home, ever little bit helps.  But this room they have me in has two beds for some reason, and windows at every angle that are highly trafficked areas.  It's a room though, so I'm happy to have it all taken care of.

I did find myself developing lines of alliteration in my head as I drove the winding roads of Arizona...which is mostly what caused me to miss my exit for 179 North.  This will have been the first poem I've written since possibly college.   Dark and intense as usual of course.  So I'm going to spend the rest of my evening weaving words...until next time!

What a Day

My day held so much ambition for me as it challenged my ability to take in everything it had in store.  Spent the morning with a family I love very much, playing rock band with Allen, cleaning up the mess from the night before while sipping on coffee, lazily sitting on the couch between Clark and Allen watching Paul.  It then took me an hour and a half to drive, or idolize, home to Pearland so I could take a shower and pack my bags.  Once I hastily did this we had to drive to the store and get my confirmation info for my flight, only to turn around and go back to the house because I forgot my necessary headphones I bought myself last birthday.  I thought to myself, 'it's a Saturday evening, I bet the airport will be swarming,' I looked at Steve and suggested I arrive an hour and a half early as opposed to my usual 30 minutes preflight.  Steve literally pushed my baggage onto the streets and I rushed into a vacant airport lobby.  It was almost eerie how quiet and desolate it all seemed.  The only companion I had was my reflection in the shiny white laminate flooring.  It took me only 15 minutes to check my baggage and avoid the X-Ray machine at security, with a work phone call mixed in between.  

On my flight I received all the perks being a Plus member.  I had the entire row to myself, free television and a complimentary warm cookie and soda on both flights.  And as I traveled back in time I watched from the air the sun breathtakingly set behind the rockies of Denver, and a magnificent electrical storm to the left of the purple and orange descending hues.  

Ofcourse my first stop in Phoenix after picking up my smoky gray VW Jetta rental was ofcourse the In N' Out Burger.  I brought my bag of fattening goodies to the hotel where I lay now in what reminds me of a modernized dorm room.  The funky modular furniture and tight IKEA organization style...I'm just glad it's a one night thing.  And on to catch some Z's before my two hour drive to work in Sedona tomorrow.

  

What I love About Houston, TX

Houston, TX

The beach is a definite!

 Green!

 Sunny Afternoons in the Montrose

 Night Lights

 The Outdoor Mall

 Hermann Park

 Rain and Rainbows

Access to Family Gatherings

and the list goes on...

Randomness Driving From Dallas to Houston

Had an amazing time in Dallas! I love having friends that love me as much as those men love me, and as I love them! So many years living apart, and we are all still so very close. After my guys trying soooo hard to convince me to be near them (unlike previous relationships) I've decided my soulmate that the psychic in Sedona spoke of will just have to take into consideration my life as well as his, unlike any other man has before him. That's my standard I'm adding to my standards list I'm starting to create. I also learned that I could definitely live in Dallas...atleast the northern part that is. :)

Soon I will be uploading a very fun video that my staff in Pearland is compiling with me. I'm hoping to have it completed and uploaded by Friday, considering I'm off to Sedona, AZ again as of Saturday! :)

Anyway couldn't get the vid to load here at Starbucks tonight...will try again tomorrow from a friends house...until then atleast you have an update! :)

August 18: Dallas TX

This Video is a quick summary of my dallas trip. Had a blast...and I felt just about as bad as I looked in that first clip. There will be a trip commentary follow up video...:)

Starring: Josh Chappell, Smerf aka Jason McLain, Jeff Ridge, Eric Keith, and introducing to our crew Chris Lamb. :)

Music: Alien Ant Farm; Movies